11 Lies Moms Tell Themselves to Keep From Going Crazy

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Sometimes, the truth hurts. It hurts so much that we’ll just lie to ourselves. Shout it out if you’ve told yourself the following…

#1: Whitening gum counts as brushing my teeth.

teeth
I mean, it says “whitening” so it should be fine!

#2: I’m totally showering today.

no

Nope.

#3: Gushers count as 1 serving of fruit.

gushers

Today it does, anyways.

#4: Sh*t isn’t that bad of a swear word, right? He’ll be fine.

nut

Sh*t happens.

#5: I’m not nervous that he isn’t walking yet.

fine
PLEASE. WALK. TO. MOMMY. PLEEEEASE!!

#6: I’m the boss.

boss

Or at least I thought I was before he started screaming.

#7: I don’t miss my old life – at all.

life

Okay, maybe a little bit. Only for a moment!

#8: I definitely don’t smell like poop.

poo

Yeah, you do.

#9: I don’t wear leggings everyday!

pants

Only on days that end in “y”.

#10: I’ll empty the dishwasher when she goes down for a nap.

boo

Zzzzzzz.

#11: That’s chocolate on my lap. I swear.

hoc

Change of pants, please. For baby and mom.


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